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Brahma_Yoga_F-Meaning_Part_23

3/2012. Australia is a possibility and should be better than Italy (when born with English). I am always serious about my picks and getting at least emotionally-mentally ready for them, even when the pick might not last a day (the heart makes sudden opinion changes based on how it feels about things when the mind sees some point that changes the weight of the pick and then one is all or something leaning with the mind and dominantly with the heart - and more or less with other deities - to the goods of the pick having the most weight, that pretty much being the game here. The thing that my changes happen so often has something to do also with the new fresh x-point, that's more strong some time than what it should be on/in the whole case, and then the mind is automatically finding goods of the other just like time and leaving makes something behind look better than what it likely is/was). But whatever, this looks like the right spot to close this case again, though I am sure it won't be the last of it, but there isn't much point to continue, though new points keep coming up, so maybe in a hundred years I will have it figured out, everything taking its time, having its time to happen, just need to 'wait' and when the hundred years is gone, one can up and go; might not be my time to go anyway and if I have to, then I would need to have the pick, but as it takes a hundred years, I can't have it made, and from that point the options are not to go anywhere (I might not be happy about that).

I just leave one Italian dictionary, It.-Eng., the last thing standing, and I don't have a possibility of being active with it, but that's pretty much it, covering Eng. also) for (the) occasional look for/of (the) old words and some for the new too, all that is good in case I change my mind or remain in Finland in case the rebirth too is unlikely with English and Italy is a good pick, and it might warm my heart a bit in the cold and dark UK, in case it's not making me feel bad too, and then I could pick some Italian persona related things in the UK too and why not if I can pick them in Finland too, and so have a small place for the Italian persona also, with its awareness, light, colors, warmer too, but it's still theoretical of how it can fit but it can't be felt objectively but by just considering the facts in Finland, and so it has some possibility but I really have absolutely no idea.

What I think matters not all that much just that it collects in me and I know some more and it seems to be a process though from the personality pick point looks more like take it or leave it and it depends on the current facts and weights but has some possibility of being a process also, though I think there are just opposite of so deities playing a game. I am not picking some one persona anymore, so that point is secondary, but for recovery, the UK gets points from that too, in spite of the better weather in Italy and the possible more F-connections being better for mental.

Even my recovery needs alone dictates what I should be doing; even the weather in Italy correlates with the right side rather than the cool left side, and I might better use the cool, and get heat and all just with imagination, that might be possible, but that's all a side issue, just an extra possibility for a manipulated mental x-balance for emotional needs, though not that it's the x-unloaded balance that I will do primarily. In a good balance (between the left and right, preferably as unloaded but more or less so in the action balance too - x-loaded at the right and the left and so in the middle as so, though one will mentally/emotionally be at both of them more, not in the more or less clearer S that's more like it when the left (N) is unloaded and before the right starts to take the majority in case one needs to x-load the left or unload the right to be at the balance and the latter is a more sure way but just maybe not needed and it would be living in the more or less clear 'SF') one also has up to no emotional needs and might possibly even live alone and do nothing as the needs are less, but there is much life in doings, though I am not sure one really needs them, but even if not, why not do also, instead, just for nothing. I think doings add to one's life, even if one has no major or any needs of/for them nor of anything but some basic things like silence and food.

The UK is a good place to die at and then have Australia possible and can stay in the UK too if born there (or in the EU and then moving in the UK for the action, though I don't know if I am able to pick but Italy then, because of the language and weather, if not directly in Australia). There are many other countries where one could also live but next to all of them miraculously more or less fail on/in points of weather, language, economics (the costs of living) and more or less in some other points.

Much of what I was as an INTP might seem to somewhat be more on the picture on this UK path, though of course not that I feel to be that person after so many changes but it could be it, with the changes, the Italian one having a different persona (starting from my ESFP times). The cooling state correlates well with the more grey UK, and it's not bad but the state the people are in who are cool or grey, and so it shows that it can be ideal for me as darker and cooler also. I am reasonably happy for this decision and to these views. The UK will be a nice rebirth, having English (also good for further recovery as well as getting information), even being in the right place as no need to move anywhere necessarily, and holidays possible (that in cases could add one month to the summer, that then in cases could get close to the longer summer e.g. in Italy, though that still doesn't get all of it, nor does it overcome the four darker winter months, thought there is some possibility one could change at least two of those weeks to sunnier ones); so, looking somewhaty good as long as the flattings problem isn't too big. I don't see this UK path is good for anyone (as it's not optimal) to who(m) it doesn't fit or is in need of it like I am (or who is not ready to learn still another language), and luckily there are some other goods too for me than the weather and the language, though I could move there even if that would not be the case, that also means I could pick any central or so enough city (from) there, but London is the one that gives me the most, though one could think of some beach place too but my beaching times are not that high on my list at this time, taking it just during a holiday somewhere, so getting this and that instead of just this or that, and the most important thing then is the sun, though I wouldn't go on a holiday during the summer just because of the sun, that's something I could do during the winter.

Not only Italy gives some meaning, right, heat, it gave peace too, that's close the meaning and negates emptiness like the heart can, that's also not outside of Italy. It not being realistic as I am not ready, true, but it doesn't mean I can't at least try, and I can then put time to study there Italian harder if I get there (in another life), or take it more slow, there being enough time before pension or whatever. At the moment it seems I get something said in Italian and will maybe learn just some more passive words (that one needs more as one can't select the words when someone else is using them). When speaking, I don't know the full Italian way and so I mostly make it first English and then I replace those words with the Italian words, and I could add some English words here and there or try to use some other words to say it, and I have an electronic dictionary (faster words).

Not that Italy is or was the only one shaking me (though these things can change, e.g. the sadness of the UK can be inner and outer and with time things tend to become united to the whole case), though the UK is solid, it won't give me the same amount of warm feelings, but something solid instead (economics, doings, work, language, global, all cooler solid things but the global more or less that's a people thing also). Both have their goods but I can't at this point say that I don't like the Italian one more, just that the reality might shake it more.

Though not the peace (that's like personal well being and has an aspect of safety in it, also seeing that shaking is more or less about non-security) that's from its part the opposite of shaking, but from economics etc. point, that I value more like every other time and it's clear so, as very factual. The question is about how much I am ready to accept the weaknesses in economics, and/or giving more value to other factors, and if those weaknesses in economics even exist in realistic amounts in the path one picks.

When shaking, the factual things might get more value though when seeing the inner goods one gets with the less factual likings, it can turn the tables, while the Italian goods are not that factual and so the lack in that factuality makes Italy drop out like every other time, but as long as one is ready to accept the lesser things, then one can accept it, and if Italy is so fine, then it should take a priority, while how can the UK be fully accepted when it seem to lack Italian things, one needing to then accept the bigger lack of them, though are those values real, that is a serious question and the UK persona doesn't really think so or values the UK things more, it then seeing it clearly as the best pick, factually, and I suppose it's right, but there are also "non-factual" things and I suppose that one should understand better then, to get them more or less factual and be done with the case, though I partly side stepped that by considering just the facts of the weather and the language of Italian, though they are directly related to the feelings, and it's not solid to say to the non-feeler or whatever that Italian is a solid fact, considering the whole comparison to English, and if the weather is really so much better that it would matter mountains of what one could get with it instead, and warmer feelings are not necessarily better than cooler feelings, or some values are not necessarily better than the other values and it might be that the cooler values are the solid foundation to making a pick and the other points are lesser ones e.g. being poor at some place with warmer values is worse than being rich under cooler value, or at least it looks like to me that the quality is overall better in being rich than sticking to the heart and be poor, it just often looking so bad, while the richer cooler is not looking bad at all, just lacking some extra heart but getting all kinds of other good things emotionally also. I am not sure to which one one would belong to/in if one would live in peace on the solid ground at least in itself, when others are not in peace but run after all kinds of things and do this and that but are not in peace (etc., maybe), or not as much and that is about the overall inner quality of life, and that's just perhaps stuck somewhere in between these two cases; having more heart but less solid ground, or having more solid ground but less heart. There are also the light and expansion factors to Italy (and temperature might also be in the Aura, not just more light). There is a specific softness quality

Like there is in clear pink as it's more comfortable or the opposite is less comfortable. What we are or like at the moment will bring up some things of what is or can be and put out some things that are or can be, also in what we see and feel, though not that the goods of these feels seem to be there in the UK for me, it being then about what one is, at the moment and some places have more of such things, in the Aura, too. Optimal and optimal related realities, persona realities, inner persona realities (and unrealities), and other place realities (than the weather and the language as optimal facts or/and as related to persona). One of the major worry factors is that the feels of the UK/London e.g. on the softness has something to do with the quality of the Aura there and it won't be good enough.

in the pictures from more or less Italy that also isn't there in the UK, that's also different than in Finland that also has its own quality, somewhere between the UK and Italy though it's more or less not about the same thing, and picking the redness level and other such things more fittingly, it matters less compared to hard factors (of) where one lives (at), though still a factor(s), just not clear of how much, plus other factors one can see and feel the usual and more perhaps and see the UK to be more modern that also looks - and feels - more straight, a grey straight modern box with specific flavors/things and mostly old houses for living.

But there are also the list of factors in the UK, and materially it's winning at least 3-1, depending on what one is ready to give up, but it's maybe not about picking doings as these values pick their doings also. From the inner point of view the place matters up to nothing, only the values inside matter, and having all those values is the best situation, but the outer situation is the reality that those values are measured with and so it seems to become also a place question - what there is at some place is a major fact and makes more or less a difference to our feelings also, but in theory under reasonable limits, one might be just fine anywhere.

I could try Italy. People are just people there, like anywhere else, though some specifics must be there as they do have some 'family' systems and high level of birth control as they are catholics it seems. Getting a clear pink, silent flat, and preferably warm, and with good vibrations or so, is pretty good about anywhere, comfortable living, at least when not at work, where things tend to be less good until one has managed to get such a place there too. Warm and silent flats are more likely to happen in Finland/Scandinavia than in the UK or Mediterranean, also considering that Finns (etc.) tend to be more silent, e.g. if they talk, talk, talk in Italy and have noisy structured flats, one is living with hearing protection all the time at home (and hope it will be enough) and maybe even at work, additionally to all places possibly being cold or hot most of the time. Life can be poor and miserable in Italy, though I don't view it that badly, but it's much because of my other likings, though cold and noise are more problems to me than they generally are. The slowness not necessarily being a problem. Italy is some tens of years behind but that's about it - might be better in the next life, like the windows and things working, just up to most of the houses are older, but if the Mediterranean is then better than before and one is not born with English, or even then. If getting things good in Finland, things can get much worse if moving to another country, or even inside the country as getting good flattings is not always or even usually easy.

I have now three howard's teddies, e.g. one radio version of those with SNR 31 as 31H, 28M, 23L and it's some better noise protections than the lesser ones, and for radio it's relatively good quality and has enough volume though uses batteries (much cheaper if one buys them in big packs). Mine cost 60e in a Finnish Prisma but on the net they can ask 100e or 200e, and not really worth the money as it only has a radio. For computer connection music and tv the quality, and silent sound maybe with the computer, is weak. Howard has also a product without a radio (one can just connect it to one) - just music/tv that's in theory as outer noise protected as the radio version and doesn't need batteries and says has good sound quality. But one needs a big room for ears or it will cause pain. There are mere teddies that are as good or better - with added sound one gets some more protection and these do not have it nor they figure to have alarm etc. possibility, though the alarm of my mp3-player at one point partly broke my radio version's left teddy it seemed (plus when waiting sleep the radio can make the mobile phone near the computer noises sometimes though not necessarily too many and it might also not happen, this product being tricky if it's broke and if it keeps those noises during nights or not and if it gets corrected all by itself, it having a will of its own, though I haven't tested it many days and it auto-closes every four hours and so is useless for sleeping until one wakes up every under four hours, or under three as it takes time to fall asleep). The no-battery one has less physical depth to the ears - that's then not clean at least and will be a problem (and it might not have a hygiene kit to it though I don't know what that is and the "cool pads," as they call them, looks more like the hygiene ones and the one in the hole is more like the one needed and one might use anything there - one can use something like paper or whatever there). The SNRs of the no battery version in reality has some less protection from some direction - the front-back leak perhaps - though it has the same numbers as the battery one has but it might be true from the side directed sounds only and I doubt that a bit also. Maybe some other brand makes the same and with depth (they likely look on the picture deeper) and at least with these SNRs. Worth or need to buy if that's all one gets and needs an alarm and can't find some other way to wake up (and listen music etc. - though using ordinary music teddies for sound/music with smaller or bigger peas in the ears or so is an option and one might manage without the peas also under mild enough outer noise cases - though not that the ears are comfortable enough with this little depth other than for the near moment before falling asleep if even there with bigger ears). The mp3-player quality with either teddy might be reasonable enough to me, though it's mainly about the more volume level perhaps, compared to my computer, all else possibly sort of being the same, though one might have a better computer there to get some more and maybe better sounds. The no-battery one is more silent with my computer - even more than the battery one that's silent. The no-battery one is probably better but not necessarily with a silent computer but the mp3 gives more volume and in that case the no battery one's more balanced quality is better - I have used it though with the mp3-player mainly and I don't have the biggest ears, or not yet if they still grow, and so it's not a waste of the cost to me though I would like a better one if there is and with at least the same sound quality - if used for music also - that there might not be, but could be worse quality. Though when waiting sleep it would be nice to get at least to the minimum protection level though one can have a bit music there too if one can fall asleep as fast then and it helps to protect any, though in some hostel one might like to protect the energy as it runs out after 50 hours or something and one needs a computer to put more energy at least in my mp3-player. And under the more noise still this alarm system is not enough but sort of needs the mere teddies that are stronger plus additional music sticks with peas and just maybe it's good enough though more or less uncomfortable and other alarm systems might be needed. The battery one - the radio one - sooner or later starting to look too high sound though one might also like it more clear but I think that is a lesser factor when one gets more volume - blocked by sound protection. Music teddies might start sounding better when one gets more used to them but the opposite might also happen and it somewhat depends on things (it's like one gets sort of like perhaps and not but yes used to anything or something - one no more sees or so it all - and in all cases what one has lately or so compared it to just might matter(s). A part of the nirvanic issue). Not that these or any teddies alone give enough noise protection in more or less cases, but in some builidings it might eliminate just enough of the more usual more or less constant silent noises, though still leaking more or less the usual and up to constant stronger ones. One has just something with the no-battery version (that are often the best option when combined to peas, as long as this combination blocks enough sound) as far as sound protections goes as this product drops a bit but enough under what's good enough in milder cases, the battery one was just on the line of being perhaps a bit okay to lesser noise cases, just not eliminating it all and there are mere teddies that are a bit better, just the alarm and partly the music, other sound, tv cases need the connections and this (or both the battery and non-battery one, the battery one without batteries and more balanced sound would be the fitting one) product is not the best if there are better ones. One, likely not as good a possibility, is to use ordinary max noise protecting teddies and put music sticks under them, but that in my case would be mostly for the case of awakening only, maybe only if one has nothing else as the ears are never as comfortable with sticks - plus teddies - in them as they are without them. Other than that the music stick's cord is not long enough for computer and tv, and the quality of music/sound is different, the music sticks being just maybe more direct, that's better and worse - more brutal and/as smaller as so. The mere teddies they have went up to SNR 36 with 37H, 34M, 26L - the highest they have there was 27L but as SNR 34, that's generally worse, and I don't know if the low sounds are the problem (maybe one just might listen at times some more low hummings then - that's though there sometimes in my life anyway - when it's all silent or whatever), it looking more like the high sounds in my case that include the bangs of cups and so to the table, and I can hear e.g. paper (inside my flat) making noises very easily closer to like no sound protection with the teddies and even with sticks - that can eliminate some stronger noises where the teddies will not with the same or even better SNRs. So, all sound is not eliminated but all sounds are cut off marginally and one of the main things is to get rid of the silent noise and the other thing is that they add to protection plus can be used with tv/music though one might use peas there instead with music teddies giving out more volume. I didn't find anything wrong with this SNR 36 mere teddie. These are all howard/Bilsom and there are others too and can be found in the net (though I didn't get the net paying to work but my pick also had a shop or/and business place in Helsinki). The sticks I know in theory go up to 29L, but they are not all comparable to teddies. These are all real numbers and significantly better than the usual teddies though I am not all sure at this point (of) how much the difference is compared to sticks (one could use peas additionally as well as music or other sound).

London has many areas like Espoo as 0.2M and so, but they are more or less all together, with people all around, though it looks like one could get a clear pink flats at least from the side places there, near the work as it's some 50 km from side to side if going directly, though in theory it would take just 30 minutes, but one is lucky to get at some place from far away in one hour. The working under red and even mere pink would not be as comfortable to me as clear pink (even more or less white maybe instead of some mere pink, just for the freshness as mere pink tends to be sleepy or something like that, at least it's an extra weight, though the lack of any pink is also a weight in emptiness that might be a problem or not. Even hobbies are more a pleasure under clear pink exactly, and any doings inside and outside are, the best being the clear pink level one doesn't feel to be too heavy or too light. Getting a flat under such, not even considering other Aura (and other) factors, is pretty reasonable as my guess even in London, though I am not all sure as there is such a massive amount of people, and the pictures do not anyway indicate about happy Aura, though not that this factor necessarily show there. Then to get a work, first preferably as the flat is better to be near enough, though some might hunt the flat first (if one gets it first) and then find a work as near as possible and later even nearer if the flat was good. But to get the flat and work (and hobbies) even under any clear pink, isn't said to happen in London.

In Italy I would have many more places to pick from while in the UK the deal would start to get worse if I would more or less drop London. All kinds of indications from submarines to deep sadnesses and Auras in the pictures and thought about the UK have been there but changes have also happened and so I am some less positive that those factors are as real as they looked to be though they were more new then and still figure to be factors. I still see the things the same way just that they might not have as much power anymore.

Still, if picking the Italian way/persona, I am picking Italy and seeing the UK as having too little light and temperature and it looks like so in the pictures also and that's not optimal. I am picking the optimal and the whole feel of it and try to deal with the problems of that deal. It's an uphill task. I am not ready even for that much sunshine and temperature, the ones - plus any other left and cool things there - in the UK keep my right down at a level where I am actually relatively ready, but not in Italy, and then adding the language study to that it's too much, like working under a hot sun, but it's the right place, and the UK isn't, for that or whatever persona.

But my optimals/feelings might not allow me to pick the UK either, and I am not really allowed to stay in Finland either because the UK is more or less better for me, just that I need the permission of the Italian persona (I can't just go in the UK under the UK-persona), that it accepts that my state and recovery needs the cooler and less studies in the UK, though it knows there is a risk that I will be reborn there and then might go in Australia, and even a better possibility that I will not even know to go in Italy in my next life.

There is a timeline also, where I should be in Finland till I am recovered enough and then go in Italy, though it's ignoring the UK persona and that I better be there instead of in Finland, though the UK-persona is not as happy to pick the UK as the Italy-persona is to pick Italy, but that's all clear already as I have cooling and balance needs. The UK persona has already been excited (as one part of that pick) about the idea of e.g. walking the street there, as just being there, just not sure what it would be so sort of sadly happy about it as there isn't a whole punch of what I could do there, just that all those things are there and I would be cooler, in a better state with the help of the UK weather and darkness, but still have things to give, (other) goods. It would be nice to have the bike full of air but it can be too much work to do so, but one can't leave it flat either if one wants to do any biking, so a middle way of putting enough air there that one can do reasonable biking, is the best way, though optimally it would be better to have the bike more full of air.

I don't see that I would pick Australia until born with English, in case it might make sense to pick it, though in the future that too isn't clear. Some clear pink silent flat in Finland might make me change my mind and I stay in Finland but that's not a realistic expectation during the next few years. I think, in Italy the first thing for me to get would be the tax number, while in the UK it might be that I get the address to the EU/ETA employment office, that looks like a piece of cake to me, impossible to miss even without knowing a thing, but both figure to need some specific papers to be sure it goes smooth, in case it goes at all, like that.

Some things are clear, and one of them is that there is no possibility of a pick for me between Italy and the UK (being in some persona for me isn't enough but both are factors all the time so I can't make my pick without them either, and so can't make an objective pick and won't have the time for that either). But Italy is optimally a better pick. Knowing the goods and bads though worried about the bads in both cases but there might be no escape as both are bad too. Being too hot in Genoa from the weather and sunshine point is not really the case but there are other things for keeping me hot as well as the UK has things keeping me cooler, not being able to stand the heat in Italy. The personas also are different and the UK persona is cool plus potentially more brain or energy dead, that's what I should be, blocked there and open elsewhere, in a cool state too, and the processes of the R2 and L6 also are no good as they need to cool down and it's hard to get anything to cool down even if it's just to get to the balance and then it takes years and maybe lives to keep getting better by staying at the right state for it and then let time to make the past to go away, the new thing then being there on/in the x-mind now. It's my dominant life(,) that I need to recover, that being the most of my life (and hard to fit into the Italy case but that's not the only factor that is talking), and that changes what I can do and that changes of what I will be and feel, and though one can then come back in a couple of lives latest, when okay, it's no way said one will, but some past things there in the Xmind might do that, though I somewhat doubt it as I am going specific ways and have got new things into my being as personality. And they (personas, doings) are place related also, just like any outer things.

I have now picked the UK, for the reason of it being cooler and it giving me the best possibility for recovery. I need that counter balance of darkness, coolness, the shadow living in the UK, in a hole like that, living base S or so (low energy nt), just working and recovering (and hopefully having a good enough time with both, and in the UK), and the better work possibilities in the UK also come some way there. This is what is my path in the darkness, not being ready for any more sunny life. It's that simple as that, simple counter(-)math. If the being more at the right, surface, light, hotter makes the right unload better, it hasn't made it clear enough and I pick a cool deep dark shadow hole to live my life at for the purpose of the state itself as well as it's the natural counter balance and not even an issue if it will be better for recovery but that it will be better for my state of balance right now

And I can always unload the left more and be hotter and do that also - and then the outer cooler is just as likely a help than getting my body in trouble - though my body can't handle it too much as it's not used to be that cool and with that little energy, it might start to do more urinating and maybe possibly shitting, like many older people use diapers (too small for adults) because of one or both of those problems because of old age and I suppose combined to less to no moving and then loading with tv, music maybe (stimulates the left at least - just also very maybe might unload the right a bit or maybe not). I also have got a somewhat bigger belly just maybe partly because (it's a common case when one gets older like I/me, and it's not all because of some extra fat but the skin gets looser and something else, and just maybe because of less right energy or more left energy, and the belly does have some pains or/and uncomforts or something and it does relate to everything down there, and to up maybe, emotionally perhaps, as well as emotional pressures to there will not be fitting under to such a weaker belly - low general right side energy, and that also indicates to other possible weaknesses because of that as control maybe [partly counting out the counter that more (right [and left]) side energy is also harder to control and less easier to control, but if e.g. some body system's controls weaken] and any right side things, and left as it's too much then) of the pressure from the left. The counter energy from the right in the body deals with the increased energy, pressure on/from the left, and things will have more power in the body when they have more right side energy, that one might need to keep low if one is recovering there but not too low on the body, or even on/in the brain etc. and the same for left energy as things need enough energy. The other/opposite problem, when unloaded from the left(,) is that one gets heated on/in the body faster till the left side energy gets stimulated more to cool it (then it's in balance with the stimulated right energy and the body cools down, as it does if one unloads that right - that more or less might not do like so for weeks even in the longs run but basically it does and in many steps and soon - or keeps it unstimulated), and when overall more unloaded like I (basically) am, it (the left) can't handle as much action that loads the left as it doesn't have as much counter balance from the right (until I make sure it has, the body especially) and the body starts to get problems.

and till I get recovered enough, though not that this body necessarily does it (in this life) but the system does as I have got results and will get more in tens of years. This is all about me and what's the best outer situation for me, and it's the UK as it's dark and cool and even more at/in the hole than Finland, and there are some delights in the UK like walking on the street, as felt, seen, understood. From much part it's +10C more during the winter half and that's about it but the deeper dark hole, and then the better possibilities and action, global. Just an ideal place for me and I figure to spend there up to several lives, doing recovery and taking the best of the possibilities there. Not that it's that Genoa is too hot as the weather as it's not the issue, then the Italian learning, it's an extra weight though it seems I can already get things said in Italian; this month I got a couple more key words ready or stronger and made a note I could say things in Italian - I seem to have achieved some first step of the critical mass of weak base Italian at that time, though the base is not ready, needing stronger words and some more and at my state of needing recovery, it's not good - more and more that's the trick there never ever being an end to it and one never gets to the goal even when it looks like to be on the next door or even right here like it might somewhat seem in my Italian case but I can't take the risk and I need the cool anyway it seems - and I would anyway need to do work with Italian much and then just maybe after like six years of work and study I might pass the language test and get the nationality

In theory one gets a permanent residency in five years but it isn't all clear to me what that means, so learning the language well enough is some extra thing, though not that need to be like that but could take ten years if one has the guts to wait and even then one might not get there. I am worried about Italy (not global (language), 'heat', economics, work possibilities) and living in a submarine in the UK helps more. Maybe in Italy i can take the heat but not as combined to language learning that will not give the heat the possibility to stay down. I have waited for many years already since I wanted to go in Italy like in 2007 and it's 2012 now, and as things are so slow, it's easily fine to be 2112 too, no problem, and it's more like 3012 that might be a better time for such things, and that's nothing as it could also be 12,012 easily - when they might have also already found a way to clean the seas, or maybe in 102,012 earliest. So, plenty time for the recovery in the hole, when we sooner or later will have the second mother or so tongue/language as English or so and good flattings also.

though using mainly the English structure, and there can be still enough work to spoil the recovery the next five years, though I might need to learn English writing and pronunciation as I don't know to put enough of them right and that is going to be some pain in the UK too that I wouldn't want to deal with and might not and see if I pass the language test as I am, though I better improve some words here and there but without it producing heat. Learning Italian is not lacking pleasure for me (if I am in the right persona, let myself change to such and be such and can comfortably be such, that are also situational, not just something one can necessarily pick even if the best (relative) absolutes out of the pack out there) but when one is not ready for the heat then one is not, and that is why I pick the UK, to cool down and keep me in the dark cool hole. The scary pictures of lesser work possibilities (though one can always move away from Italy or anywhere, though I don't have much energy to waste nor time), lesser salaries, possibly more noisy and colder flats though the opposite might be true, and I am not liking the situation in the UK and when the outer weather is worse there is less possibilities to spend time out and so the flattings in theory are better in Italy, but I am scared of the worse economical things to put it in one word, and I am scared or worried of the heat and language study coming on the way of a cooler priority, and I am scared of the lack of globality of Italian and maybe even in Italians. Though the flattings are up to horrible (in the UK but in Italy too, I suppose), I feel globally, economically and from the recovery point safer and better to take the UK. If I don't find clear pink flats (and preferably work) from London, then I need to go some over London, maybe not further like to an another city far away as it might be sad, but if at some point getting a reasonable flat at clear pink just outside of London then no all full problem, but a longer way to work (and everywhere) (maybe not clear pink work and hobbies but not impossible as in Finland's Espoo and Vantaa one could in theory easily live, work and have hobbies in/at clear pink). On the time scale, Italy can wait, maybe next life, or the next after that or later, also depending on where I will be reborn at. Having born without English, and even outside of the EU (they just might put the EU people in priority in the EU or even need to give an official reason why someone was employed from outside of the eu, though not sure knowledge and might not be in the whole of the EU but maybe just in some country like Portugal, just maybe, that by the way has a language similar to Spanish - or maybe sounds like Russian that's maybe so about Romanian also, another Latin or so based language, but Romanian doesn't sound bad and by the way has an UK winter and a Mediterranean summer and both the weather and the language are in between this Italy vs the UK issue just the economics are weak though they are improving coming out of communism and it isn't necessarily impossible even now just on the side track of best options though not that it is necessarily worse than the UK or even Italy and it is low cost - and Portuguese maybe can't be tolerated until all other factors are next to superior, if even then), then more possibility I will pick Italy next life (if Vietnam would have low enough flat rents for normal workers and learning the language would not be an issue, i could go there, to north Vietnam as cooler from India as there is no cool sea side place in India, that has mainly north India and Karnataka as cooler but during spring, and India has good economics considering the living costs, so I am not too likely going but maybe to Australia from there if i can get there, e.g. pick a profession that has a shot to get there, and Australia is going to be bigger and is still open for some normal workers, though they might be considered skilled workers at some other countries also like South Africa, Durban city, has the best weather (or it rains much during the summer) and warm sea on the Indian Ocean side, the other side isn't warm, and it has 24% Indian/Asians and (a) reasonable economics i suppose, but not sure with what professions one gets there, and in Australia it is Brisbane most open, just having a hotter summer, above 28C), and the reason why there is a real possibility for that is that I am looking for a place, and that's possibly on my list in the next life too(,) or at this time it still is, but I might get rooted in the UK, on the cool side, even if then reborn elsewhere.

I am now accepting my situation and making the cooler the dominant pick; the UK, and I have started to feel up to sort of good in the cool sea, it being my home (my medicine) now till I get better and then maybe I can come back to the light but I am taking it as a lifetime decision for me that I will be living in that hole, just recovering, and then maybe getting to take some holidays later, if I want as they are not cool, until taking a cool holiday, though taking two weeks in Dubai during the dark winter looks fine, it being just two weeks and cuts the winter a bit; this last winter half was no fun for me in Finland and I wouldn't want to repeat it, though I will need to see at least one more of those, and likely without a winter holiday. It's the end of the 3 and I have some weeks already seen how my state is not good after the winter, needing some more weeks to get myself to the summer half in my head also. Though the not good state isn't the main issue, the recovery and the productive counter balance is, though no need to make it any worse than it needs to be and it can/could or should be (at some time later at least) be good also as it's based on productive counter balance, that though is not the optimal but just medicine. At the moment I am deep in the hole and stuck on the flow too as a part of picking the UK, the just passed winter half, the state of unload of the right bit there but then stuck, and some outer actions now and near pressing on, but I know it's because I am stuck, and have this pick fresh, and I do see where the way out of the hole more or less is as I can just look at there, and still remain more or less in the hole.

I don't necessarily see objective enough reasons why some Italy is too hot for me, but it seems to be, and the UK cools me down, though I am in the hole there more or less (seems to be more or less a part of the deal). Also if over 27 or 28C is too hot for all, I don't know, though I know that generally that seems to be the opinion somewhere, but I am also too hot inside, though there is another factor that I am often or usually colder than people normally on the surface as I am unloading (though there is a point where I am too hot on the surface and might be all the time if I keep the left unloaded and more and if it's summer or hotter outside), and because of that unload I am maybe a bit more easily suffering cold like inside when it's under 22C where my body can barely manage, but I am in (an) opinion that people figure to generally think 20C is rather low though lots of people do not seem to think much twice of such or 21C, but I have also felt the cold floors and surfaces of all and the body's also, that 21C is cold and 22C barely isn't, so I see no reason there being an objective mistake at the cold side either.

 For me the UK is the pick because of my inner hotness that is better there than in Italy though I can't see the objective facts of it just like that, just the general cooler and darker nature of the UK, though the differences sort of are small but what is small (not necessarily anything like small, it being significant) and the pictures show things that I consider more or less facts as well as the expansion and the opposite in the UK. Happy, sad, cold, hot, real things to me and objective enough. My pick is about what's best for me at this point and in this life or later as a whole (and in the next life to start with but it has goods and bads, though my options are more open if I am born in the UK, that I don't highly rate to be even if I would die there), and that place is the UK as I am not ready for Italy and in my case I am better to be in the UK than in Finland, theoretically speaking.

I am pretty sure this going in the UK decision is final and that it will hold. It took about 2.5 years to make (or to come to) this decision. Many factors I came to think and know along the way to this so called decision. Not that it's theoretically the best pick for me, that hasn't been solved; no decision has been made, it being a big question, though it's the safe pick to pick the UK there too, so I don't see I am losing anything at all there either. This is likely the last major decision/thing I needed to make (or got done) in this life, there being no need to T/think any more, just the practical things, that there will be many till I am done.

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